I want Tim to be Chuy's best friend!!

If you watch Chelsea Lately, then you know her assistant Chuy. There is a contest to be Chuy's best friend, and since im lacking the obvious appendages, Im nominating TIMMER! following is Tim's essay (which I wrote, but shh!).

"If I could describe myself in 5 words or less, they would be... Shining Star. I say this because I'm bright and people like to look at me. I'm just a laid back guy, trying to make good life decisions. Personally, I would rather hula hoop during rush hour in the middle of the intersection than listen to Miley Cyrus say 'Whaaaaaaaaaat?' one more time. Man, the things I would do for a mullet like Billy Ray's. Anyway, this tequila's making me thirsty, so I'm getting myself a beer."

MAKE A GOOD LIFE CHOICE CHUY!!

Silver Fox

Noun; An older gentleman who is rediculously good looking, incredibly charming, and makes lots of money. Who also must be living. In other words, they're not hard to look at.

Examples: Bruce Willis, Tom Petty, Denzel Washington, Gene Simmons, Richard Gere, The CSI Character 'Grissom', Nicholas Cage, John Travolta (pre-hairspray), Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Ben Stiller, Will Farrell, Jim Carey, Tiger Woods, Brett Farve, Ben Affleck, Mel Gibson, etc...

Silver Foxes in Training: Brady Quinn, Tom Brady, Josh Hartnett, Edward Norton, Matt Damon, Zac Effron.

All the KOOL kids drink KOOL-aid

why is Kool-aid named such?

Is it because it is KOOL?

When they say KOOL, do they mean Refreshing?

Does drinking Kool-aid make you KOOL? (i hope so!)

Either way, I love Kool-aid. but only the purple and blue kinds.

Things I've Come To Realize

The person that you count on the most will let you down at some point or another.

Don't regret something that once made you happy.

Money, unfortunately, doesn't grow on trees.

I'm slowly turing into my mother, and I finally don't think that's a bad thing.

You're always going to be the Villain in somebody's story.

True friends can be counted on TWO hands, if you play your cards right.

The guys who are completely wrong for you will always make you feel so right.

Complaining will get you no where in life.

You will find love when you're not looking for it.

Your BEST friends are the ones that come back after you've had a fight.

Driving like an idiot in the snow is usually a bad idea.

Chocolate really does have healing powers.

Dwelling on things from the past isn't going to make life any easier. 

If you can't forgive, forget.

coincidence?

Bloody Mary's start with the letter B. So does Bad ass and Beautiful... coincidence? I think not!

Conspiracy?

If Walmart is really the "super center" it claims to be, then why do they only carry five flovors of koolaid there? Somethings suspicious around here.

How To: Spot a Douche bag

Cowboy Hat. You look like an idiot. Unless you're from Texas and you have a tan and a hot accent, DONT WEAR AN EFFING COWBOY HAT!!!!! How can you look in the mirror and think you look good with a stupid cowboy hat on? do yourself a favor and burn it... preferably while its still on your head, but thats not up to me.